Studio Hive

[SBN] Paul the Psychic Octopus invades the hearts of Russia

The CSKA Moscow/Spartak Moscow rivalry has everything a hot-blooded sports fan could possibly wish for: Matches played in front of 75,000 fans and 2,400 guards (guards spaced three feet apart and protected by a moat, a fence, and a legion of attack dogs), reliably frequent violent outbursts, fans ripping seats out of the stadium to brain each other with, and full-speed play in two feet of snow surrounded by howling crowds of shirtless drunks.

Over the weekend, these sporting Russian hooligans further endeared themselves to the international community with a display of devotion to soccer's most venerated cephalopod, Paul the Psychic Octopus.

(Read the rest at SB Nation.)

[SBN] H8ers gonna h8: Paul the Psychic Octopus upsets petulant scientists

Haters follow success as inevitably as sleeping in the bathtub follows mixing tequila with peppermint schnapps. Witness: a scant two days after a run of perfect World Cup predictions made him a media sensation, Paul the Psychic Octopus is fending off critics from all walks of life, from would-be winners who didn't heed his picks at the betting window to cynical biology types who sound like they have important science jobs they ought to be doin.

(Read the rest at SB Nation.)

[SBN] The octopus story that won't die: Paul gets a trophy!

t's been a tumultuous and often dangerous World Cup journey for our international media darling, Paul the Psychic Octopus. He threw his home country into a tailspin by correctly foretelling their on-field doom, weathered* death threats from jilted tapas aficionados, took shelter under the protective auspices of a foreign government, and suffered the indignity of unauthorized biographical details leaking to the press. Today, finally, the world's foremost eight-legged oracle gets his just desserts.

(Read the rest at SB Nation.)

[SBN] Paul the Psychic Octopus did not ask for these powers

You thought Germany was pissed yesterday at the thought they might lose a soccer match thanks to the prognostications of a psychic octopus? (That's before he turned out to be right, and a 1-0 defeat in the World Cup semis sent the German national team home, mind.)  Poor Paul the octopus is now receiving actual death threats from Argentinian hooligans, because he clearly affected the match in favor of a German side he intended to jettison in the very next round.

(Read the rest at SB Nation.)

[SBN] Arizona bar serving lion burgers during the World Cup

Say, sports fan, is your local sports bar running cheeky drink specials in honor of the World Cup? Swell! It pales in comparison, however, to a joint in Arizona serving lion burgers, made, we're sure, with 100% American-born giant cats.

[Because] lion meat has a "very rich flavor" that risks being overwhelmed by add-ons, the burger is seasoned only with "a little salt and pepper and a little fresh herbs" with chipotle mayonaise served on the side. No cheese on the lion burger, and certainly no lettuce, because, as Selogie put it, "The King of the Jungle doesn't eat lettuce."

Yes, that makes perfect sense. In fact, there's your marketing campaign right there. "Hi. I'm a lion. And when I'm cannibalizing my brothers on the savanna mixed with only the finest sirloin, I stay right the hell away from vegetables. Lettuce: Not Even Once."

(From SB Nation.)

Say, sports fan, is your local sports bar running cheeky drink specials in honor of the World Cup? Swell! It pales in comparison, however, to a joint in Arizona serving lion burgers, made, we're sure, with 100% American-born giant cats.

[Because] lion meat has a "very rich flavor" that risks being overwhelmed by add-ons, the burger is seasoned only with "a little salt and pepper and a little fresh herbs" with chipotle mayonaise served on the side. No cheese on the lion burger, and certainly no lettuce, because, as Selogie put it, "The King of the Jungle doesn't eat lettuce."

Yes, that makes perfect sense. In fact, there's your marketing campaign right there. "Hi. I'm a lion. And when I'm cannibalizing my brothers on the savanna mixed with only the finest sirloin, I stay right the hell away from vegetables. Lettuce: Not Even Once."

(From SB Nation.)